My heart, mind, and body are all over the place these days. Seriously ... it is not easy stuff to realize that your last child is 18 and you have to redefine your every-day routine.
My kids are 18, 20, and 23 ... and yet, my brain has a hard time moving past the time that they were are 1, 3, and 6. How is it that I am now a parent to adult children? Surely there has been some mistake. My oldest married last October, my middle one is half-way through college, and my youngest is graduating high school. I was just doing all of those things yesterday. I feel like a peer, but it is rather evident that I am not.
My kids aren't the demanding ones any more, to be clear. No longer do they need me to cut their apples into slices and remove the skins so they don't choke. No longer do I need to remind them to check traffic before they cross the street ... but they'll gratefully still indulge our joining hands (although theirs is usually the one on top now). No longer do I have to ask them if they brushed their teeth before bedtime. No longer do I need to tell them when to go to bed! No longer do I pick up their toys and books and put them in the baskets in the family room. No longer do I pack their lunches and arrange their backpacks by the front door. No longer do I do their laundry (although a couple of them would welcome my doing it!) No longer do I run to Subway in between double-headers to get a sandwich for a starved baseball player ... he packs his own homemade ones now. :/) They do all these things for themselves.
No ... it's not my kids that demand of me anymore. It's me. I love being "Mom". I love providing for my kids. I love being needed. I love doing for those I love. It's hard for me to accept after so many years of providing for my children's every need (starting with nutrition and unconditional love) that they don't need me for much any more. They are all independent, can feed themselves, clothe themselves, buy their own things, make decisions as to where to attend college, what type of person to date, who to marry, when to buy a house, ...
We are still parents to be sure, but we function more as banks of knowledge and wisdom. We try to keep our interest rate reasonable. :)
Here's an example: (It's Saturday evening/early Sunday as I write this.) Ben is home for Mother's Day since the baseball team so graciously played Friday/Saturday this weekend rather than Saturday/Sunday. Before he went to bed tonight, he said, (with a rather expectant sparkle in his eye) "Are you making breakfast in the morning, Mom?" Ken interjected rather quickly, with the same expectant sparkle in his eye, "French toast, please?!" My immediate response to those sparkles was "Of course, I'll make breakfast! But wait!!! ... It's Mother's Day!! I'm supposed to get breakfast in bed!" Ken quickly backtracked and said, "I'll make breakfast. Don't worry!" To which Ben replied with longing in his eyes, "Mom, PLEASE make breakfast!"
So I'm on for Mother's Day breakfast and Ken & Co. will make dinner.
Just have coffee ready and keep it flowing!
Happy Mother's Day!